I remember it like it was yesterday. I was only only about 5 years old but I remember it. We lived in this small house, decked out in tacky linoleum and hardwood panels for walls. The kitchen was small and a brown table stood in it. I came walking from out of the living room because I heard my mom and step-dad talking loudly. My mom was hugging my step-dad and saying "thank you, thank you". There, on the table was this balloon with flowers (roses I believe). It was heart shaped or something like that and it said "It's a girl". At the time this balloon was just a piece of floating material to me. What I didn't know was that it represented a lot more than that. This balloon was about to change my life. Why? Because it meant my mom was pregnant with my very first little sister. 
I remember when we went to the hospital to see her. She was so little when I held her (with help of course). Victoria Liz-beth Bailey they called her. I liked that name because it sounded girlie at the time. The day had arrived to bring her home to our house on beech street (we had moved before she was born). At first, life was great. My brother Reagan and I had a new playmate. She was cute with curly hair and my mom always dressed us alike. I liked her. She was my baby sister and I didn't mind driving her around in my barbie jeep or sharing baby dolls. I remember my mom entered Victoria into these baby model contests and we would have to tag along and behave while Victoria was dressed in frilly outfits and puffy socks and hats. I remember this one time specifically when we went to the mall ( I think) to get her pictures taken. She wore this white outfit and Alabama shoes. She was pretty good at this picture thing because she always smiled so big.
In this house on beech street was a bedroom. Victoria and I shared that room. While most babies have an adorable crib, Victoria would sleep in nothing but her "Pack & Play". Seriously if they put her in a crib she stood at the edge and cried and cried. As soon as you put her in the pack and play...she was asleep. One day, Victoria learned how to tip her pack and play over. She would tip it over, crawl out, and head on into the living room. I would still be asleep most of the time or just laying there in bed. Every time she did it, I was the one my momma would blame: "Brianna I know you want to help but leave Victoria in her bed and quit waking her up". I NEVER once took that baby out of her bed like that. The dare devil tipped it all on her own. This point in our lives I believe started the war between us. It always consisted of Victoria or myself doing something that upsets the other or got us into trouble.
For a short while we lived in Mississippi with our grandparents. Victoria and I were close again at that point because I was always making sure she was by my side. Reagan was not with us and our younger sister Reed was a tiny baby. So I had become more like a mom and was always helping to give the girls a bath or get them dressed. To be honest, I was only in 2nd grade and I would cry every morning on the school bus ride because I missed them so much. The teachers would even pull me aside and promised me that my baby sisters were fine. I remember one morning when Victoria stood at the door in her fake Fisher-Price princess jewelry and waved bye-bye. I always wished that she could come with me.
After that, life carried on. More babies came and Victoria and I grew further and further apart. I never hated her...we just had nothing in common and being five years older than her, I grew up and became interested in just about everything else. Being little mommy was hard and my parents always expected a lot from me. I think this caused a lot of my relationship issues with Victoria because I was not her sister but her "babysitter".
Now if you know me and my sister Victoria, you know that we have not always gotten along. I am mouthy and motherly. Victoria is curious, quiet, and smart. Once I left for Missouri my sophomore year of high school, I was no longer in Alabama to be around Victoria. At first, this was no big deal but over the years, I miss her all the time. She is her own person now, also in college and she is no longer that baby that stole my dolls or messed up my room. She is now Victoria Liz-beth Bailey, the young woman who has done it better than any of us ever could. Just recently we apologized for EVERYTHING that ever upset the other. It was a great thing because I miss her and I feel awful for missing out on some of this biggest parts of her life so far. I was suppose to be her big sister and most of the time, I was her enemy. I think if we can learn to understand each other, we will be just fine.
We may not be a like in all aspects but we are very similar and I just never opened my eyes wide enough or long enough to see this. I am still working on my attitude to "mother" her sometimes but we are making progress. I feel it is important everyone knows the truth. I think it is important that Victoria knows the truth. I have never been jealous of her but I do envy her spunk, wit, and curious personality. She is a girl who knows what she wants and knows how to get there. She is a girl who loves her family and friends. She may be a little guarded and reserved but hey, she is who she is and I love her for it. I love that she has a deep interest for squirrels, I love that she is classy and simple. I love that she has made it to college and loves being a true student. I love her who she has chosen to be her boyfriend and best friend. I love how she is smart and can out talk anyone. Most of all, I love how we were as litte girls.
I only hope that Victoria and I continue to work on being better sisters to one another and I hope that as we get older, our families are tight-knit and that calling each other everyday is not out of the ordinary. I love my very first baby sister and I always will, no matter what happens. 
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